It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
