You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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