Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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