Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
She even gives head with a lisp.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
