worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
