Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize