Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
