I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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