nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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