I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
