So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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