you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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