i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
