You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
