SEEEEXXX PLEASE
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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