FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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