I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
