...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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