what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
