Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
