Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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