Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
