ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
