So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
