He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
only you would photoshop your dick
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize