Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
