I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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