It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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