yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
