dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
