Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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