And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
