how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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