I'm jealous of your bromance
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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