Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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