Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Randomize
