You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
