Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
