i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
we made out on top of his cat.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
