I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
