idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Randomize
