what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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