I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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