I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
