so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
You need a sexual gate keeper
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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