Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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