So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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