I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
