Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize