My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
